Operation: Surprise, Part 4

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

Today was a day of perks. Well, if perks are good-looking women. Why not?

I started the morning off with another case of GPS directions gone bad. The school I was trying to visit apparently moved. I later found out that the street it’s now on is named after the landlord who owns the building I was visiting. And it’s all brand new. Google maps couldn’t even get it right. It brought me to the other side of town. Couldn’t it have just said, “Sorry, I got nothin’” instead of guessing? Bah.

The director of financial aid is who I usually meet with when I’m visiting these schools, but she was new and wasn’t available. That usually means the campus director will meet with me. The campus director in small town Illinois = hottie. Yes, it’s true. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t flirt with her a little. It kind of weirded me out though because she’s gotta be in her 30s and last I checked that was way old. Now that I’m 26 maybe my acceptable age range has expanded. I may have to get used to that.

As a side, I bet half of the people I’ve met this week have said one or both of the following things:

“When I heard the auditor was coming, I was really nervous. How did I do?” and/or,
“You don’t look like an auditor.”

The latter, I take as a compliment.

It is kind of empowering (?) when I walk into these places and check in with the receptionist. “Yeah, I’m here to see so and so big-wig.”

“Who’s your advisor?”

“No. I’m the auditor.”

As I was driving the four hours to my next stop in Des Moines, Iowa, I encountered my most major GPS problem yet. Somehow my position on the map was in the middle of the forest and not on any roads. It couldn’t recalculate my route because it didn’t know what road I was on. I already had a tight schedule to keep and I didn’t really have time to be messing with wrong directions. I ended up back tracking a bit back to a town I just passed so I could ask for directions.

Through it all, I’ve learned that I will always ALWAYS have a map with me at all times. You just can’t replace the ability to pull that thing out when all else fails. It’s always reliable. It also really bugs me that when I’m not using a map, I have no sense of where I am in the city. Sure, it gets me to where I need to go, but I couldn’t tell you at all what parts of St. Louis I was in on Tuesday. No good.

Maps are my friend.

I finally arrived in Des Moines. The women I talked on the phone with on Tuesday to confirm my appointment for Wednesday sounded pretty cute. This is usually hit-and-miss though as lots of people sound good-looking (see: all radio DJs).

So she sounded cute and her name was one of those names that I associate with attractive girls. I actually found myself getting a little nervous to meet this woman when I knew nothing about her. Kind of odd.

I waited in the lobby for _____ and, though she wasn’t quite was I was expecting, she definitely was cute and definitely closer to my age than the last woman I mentioned. I sort of felt a connection with her after our 20 minutes together, but you know, it’s hard to tell. It may have just been me, as usual. And it’s not like anything can come of it, so I dismissed that thought as soon as I thought it. Okay, enough of that.

After my appointment, I stopped to get something to eat on my way to the Iowa State Capitol building downtown. I was the first car at the red light and I was unwrapping my sandwich. The light turned green. I stepped on the gas. Not two seconds later I see some dude in my right side mirror up in arms looking like he’s yelling at me. I guess I almost ran him over? Dude, he must have started walking through the intersection way later than he was supposed to. I know, I still should have seen him and he still has the right of way, but that’s bull. So yes, I’m lucky I didn’t take this guy out and spend the night in jail. Idiot. It probably wasn’t as close as it looked. I hope.

I arrived at the Iowa State Capitol and planned on getting a tour while I was there. The security guard told me that only on the guided tours can you go up in the dome area. Come to find out, the next and last tour of the day is with a bunch of 4th graders. No thank you. Self-guided tour, here I come.

I was only about 10 minutes in when I got a call from the office. An audit I’ve been a part of is trying to be wrapped up this week while I’m gone and apparently I didn’t finish all of my work. In a semi-panic, I left the capitol so I could get to my hotel in case the partner called and I needed my computer. Oh bother. I suppose I am still on the clock even though my work for the day is done.

To cap off the day, I was checking in at the Radisson when the front desk tell me they’ve moved my room because of overbooking. Okay, great. But they bumped me up to the room with the hot tub, fireplace, and two plasma flatscreens. Oh yeah!! Hot tubbin’ it on a Wednesday afternoon. Can’t beat it.

I ended the day by going to a movie I’d already seen but loved so much that I thought “why not end a great day with a great movie?” and I was really craving movie theatre popping corn. After the movie, I hot tubbed it again. Ooooh.